"Bucket list — Challenge yourself to do something that intrigues your interest and just do it. It forces you to look at life in the present moment and change the life that best suits you. If these two lifestyles are dissimilar, it can provide motivation with inspiration to begin living a life you best resonate with. I did this with studying art and classical piano, and it subconsciously led me to making a choice in the direction I wanted to live my life. It provided me the freedom of expression and guided me to partake in extraordinary opportunities that unexpectedly arrived."
It feels most comfortable to stick with what we are familiar with. But anyone who has achieved great success will tell you that true growth comes from pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. What are some ways that influential people have pushed themselves out of their comfort zone to grow both personally and professionally? As a part of this series, I had the pleasure of interviewing Bonnie Frankel.
Life’s unexpected circumstances as well as Bonnie’s free will to challenge her to get out of an accustomed lifestyle would test her resiliency. Bonnie gradually learned to trust the uncertainties because it would intensify her belief that she would not only thrive personally but professionally as well. The “Little Dickens,” would always prosper from going beyond her comfort zone because it generated unforeseen dreams to be actualized.
Thank you so much for doing this with us! Before we start, our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your childhood backstory?
Growing up in a dysfunctional family staged in the plush Bel-Air area was the beginning of being thrust out of my refuge at a young age. My mother suffered from acute depression which would result in many emotional breakdowns, which eventually led to her suicide. Although the delicacy of my mother’s situation frightened me, it escalated my inherent commonsense and tenacity to reduce her distress by being a good listener, as well as reassuring her to look at the bright side of life. Comforting her would enable me to mature early coupled with ensuing the courageousness to dim my fear when uncertainties arose. This early unexpected encounter was the beginnings that would thrust me to thrive not only personally but professionally.
Can you please give us your favorite “Life Lesson Quote”? Can you share how that was relevant to you in your life?
“Faith Is taking the first step even when you don’t see the whole staircase.” Martin Luther King Jr. When initiating the first step in trying something new, it alerted my feelings of anxiety and fear. Once I was able to let go and go with the flow, I relaxed with the process to trust that the uncertainty would turn out to be a blessing. The road less traveled would lead me to see the forest from the trees and this chance of change when repeated would lead to endless unexpected opportunities. This approach prepared me for the numerous beginnings of risks that were going to repeat in my life to become unstoppable. There was a time when my life story movie and exercise book were on the verge of selling, but the universe rained on my parade. The first step to re-cooperate from my losses was to rebuild my life. Homeless with ten dollars in my pocket, I launched my journey from the sea to the desert. I was able to resume training to qualify for the Olympic trials after having had a hip replacement. Unexpectedly, while I trained, someone noticed my talent and revealed it to the Olympian John Carlos. John took on the job to coach me to my goal at the age of sixty. I believe I was the only athlete that was coached by both Olympians, Tommie Smith and John Carlos. By taking the first step into a new lifestyle, it allowed me to attempt to go for the goal.
Is there a particular book, podcast, or film that made a significant impact on you? Can you share a story or explain why it resonated with you so much?
The Book Thief, authored by Marcus Zusak portrays Liesel as a remarkable spunky main character who portrays a spirited inspirational hero. She was plucked out of her comfort zone at an early stage of her life. She relentlessly took on the compelling challenges that honed her to not only thrive personally which paved the way to achieve an unperceived professional career. Her tenacity to tenaciously learn how to read and write, would lead to authoring many books. Liesel is a kind, loyal, fearless soul fearlessly takes on the dares as she matures like a fine wine going beyond her comfort zone. I symbolically relate to her temperament because of the similarities of my being uprooted in my growing up years and the difficulty to retain knowledge because of undetected learning disabilities. I struggled with the learning process, and eventually broke free from my comfort zone by saying good bye to the entitled lifestyle. Soon after, I rebooted my path unexpectedly by re-entering the educational system where I fell in love with words that conveyed content, and the welcomed comfort of learning. Ultimately, this grew me to became a renaissance artist, as I am tackling being an author and a writer. It’s a privilege to learn as well as to share my views by writing articles for my publisher.
Let’s now shift to the main part of our discussion. Let’s start with a basic definition so that all of us are on the same page. What does “getting outside of your comfort zone” mean?
Discovering new horizons by challenging uncertainties to thrive beyond your expectations. When you think outside the box it feels uncomfortable at first, but as you forge ahead, the process unravels with the intrigue of feeling more comfortable with the uncertainty as the fear lessens and your intuition trusts the process. Doing things that you wouldn’t ordinarily engage in provokes symptoms of lack of power, insecurity, and taking risks that you would never do by exposing yourself to the possibility of stress and anxiety. When you remain in your comfort zone, it gives you the feeling of consistency, steady performance, but stepping outside your normal terrain exposes you to new and challenging tasks that will condition you and your environment to expand your freedom and knowledge to flourish personally and professionally.
Can you help articulate a few reasons why it is important to get out of your comfort zone?
Each of us are blessed to be an exceptional not a mediocre. To achieve exceptional, it is mandatory to expand your boundaries because you are robbing yourself psychologically from gaining new insights to elevate your horizons. The interference of fear is what keeps you in the same old safe place because you are accustomed to it and as time goes by it’s harder to break free. The new opportunities that develop could enrich your life but you will be left behind because your eagerness to explore new avenues diminishes. When you experience new experiences, you are open to acquiring a renewed self- confidence, obtaining new skills and develop the courage needed to open up to new ideas. Stepping away from our emotional crutches is an arduous step to take, but once you take that first step it eliminates your trepidation which allows you to tap into your tower of strength to tackle the unknown. The risk of moving outside your comfort zone will increase your resilience. You are going to develop faith in how you handle failures/setbacks, and acclimate to increased levels of stress, anxiety, and uncertainty. Stepping out of your comfort zone means learning new things, meeting new people, seeking new places, and experiencing new experiences. All of these opportunities can amplify your awareness and where you fit in as the world after Covid.
Is it possible to grow without leaving your comfort zone? Can you explain what you mean?
Feeling safe will stifle your ability to expand personally as well as professionally because you will not challenge yourself to engage in anything that is different. While remaining comfortable, you are the captive of ignorance, because you deny your chance to grow in a world that keeps evolving. Without adding new challenges and goals expansion in life will pass you by. You might like your own little world, but it inhibits your ability to thrive.
Can you share some anecdotes from your personal experience? Can you share a story about a time when you stepped out of your comfort zone and how it helped you grow? How does it feel to take those first difficult steps?
There were many episodes that occurred in my life and still do. This one experience had many complications that unexpectedly grew me into areas that were beyond belief. Returning early from my visit to the Middle East (towards the end of the sixties war in Israel), I received a phone call from my dad to tell me that my mother jumped two stories from our home, and return home immediately. I was in Germany at that time and it was around the new year and there was next to none transportation until the following day. I slept on the bench at the airport and didn’t know whether my mom was going to pull through this ordeal. When I arrived from an anxious flight home, I was able to connect with my mom and assist her physically, mentally and emotionally through her tragic ordeal. You never know what is on the horizon, but each experience as challenging as they appear, prepares me for another, which gracefully makes me more comfortable to expand stepping outside my comfort zone. Sooner than later, I stepped outside my comfort zone once again, entering another unexpected intriguing assignment to work for the infamous hairstylist, Jay Sebring.
What are your “five ways to push past your comfort zone, to grow both personally and professionally”?
- Exercise — Take on a fitness challenge. By moving to an exercise that is right for you will boost the mind to push past your comfort zone releasing toxic emotions inhaling H20 which enhances you to get in the zone of accruing healthy emotions. This gently instigates you to abstractly lose your security blanket with the help of challenging yourself by aggressively advancing workouts. This will lead you to nourish that same feeling in other areas in your life personally and professionally.
- Risk taking — When we take a chance on trying something new even if you fail, the essential thing to remember is not to harbor on the negative, but to see it as an opportunity to learn from. If you don’t step outside your place of familiarity, it hinders your growth in all aspects of life. Divorcing taught me to take a chance on finding myself because I didn’t want to look back and regret the chance of a lifetime to blossom before it was too late. If I hadn’t taken up the challenge, I would not have found independent Bonnie with her resilient nature to search for the right path to be able to thrive in. I would never have found what makes my time clock tick and be inspirational and motivational not only to myself but to others as well.
- Bucket list — Challenge yourself to do something that intrigues your interest and just do it. It forces you to look at life in the present moment and change the life that best suits you. If these two lifestyles are dissimilar, it can provide motivation with inspiration to begin living a life you best resonate with. I did this with studying art and classical piano, and it subconsciously led me to making a choice in the direction I wanted to live my life. It provided me the freedom of expression and guided me to partake in extraordinary opportunities that unexpectedly arrived.
- Journaling — Document a short list of what your desires are, and then gradually expand it to guide you to step outside your comfy zone. This taps into your incentive by eliminating the fear by starting small then getting more comfortable to gradually increase the level. Engaging in this process will encourage you to change your daily and weekly routines to flee from your comfort zone. You can always refer back to the list because it is written in stone and it is your private bible. Many times, what we think we feel, can be totally different than writing it down. Never underestimate the power of words because they lead you to taking prompt action.
- Group activities — Creates to nurture your sense of belongingness and connection. Connecting with a group is helpful to take a step outside of your comfort zone and partake in activities you may have never dreamed possible. You are also surrounded by others that have the same mission. When I re-entered the education system by challenging my comfort zone a whole new vision opened up to me. I was able to grasp data academically, change my narcissistic nature, and align with a whole new younger generation as opposed to the upper 5% who became my new besties. I took up a running class with my new friends who had more experience than I in this field. They taught me the rules of running. I fell in love with the run as it trickled in to various areas of my self- growth. With a cherry on top, I was honored to be asked to be student body president at the college by a group of teachers.
From your experience or perspective, what are some of the common barriers that keep someone from pushing out of their comfort zone?
Fear immobilizes you from stepping outside of the box to enjoy healthy and growth -related opportunities. When you really get stuck into your routines and are not willing to change them not only does it stunt your personal growth, but it also prevents you from expanding to thrive professionally. Perfectionism is another trait that freezes you from taking action. Being or thinking you are flawless can stop the flow of generating new ideas and seizing opportunities, and your creativity is at risk. Resist your ego. Remember perfectionism is only a barrier if it is really preventing you from leading the life you were destined to live in stagnation.
There is a well-known quote attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt that says, “Do something that scares you every day”. What exactly does this mean to you? Is there inherent value in doing something that pushes you out of your comfort zone, even if it does not relate to personal or professional growth? For example, if one is uncomfortable about walking alone at night should they purposely push themselves to do it often for the sake of going beyond their comfort zone? Can you please explain what you mean?
By taking scary baby steps each day prepares me to gradually tackle bigger steps because it becomes a routine as it denies fear. This puts me in the groove to further amp up my resiliency using caution. The things that scare me the most are the experiences that bring me closer to fulfilling who I really am that guides me to thrive. Today’s ever- changing world, trying something new is part of life because of the challenges Covid launched. Pushing against the grain by doing it gingerly, just makes you feel good. When I run the trails with my dog, I inspire many others not only to get a hitch in their step but to change a fear. An incident occurred with a youngster who was afraid of dogs. He was scared to throw the ball to my dog and I told him if he did this one thing, it not only would change this fear, but it would change other frights that occur in his life. Whenever I see him, he is over the moon about throwing the ball to my dog, Suri. He now is in the process of challenging other areas that made him fearful and the ability to learn new things. Do something that scares you every day, because you never know where it will take you.
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the most amount of people, what would that be?
Just do it.
Is there a person in the world whom you would love to have lunch with, and why? Maybe we can tag them and see what happens!
Marcus Zusak
How can our readers follow you online?
Bonniefrankel.com, Facebook, Medium Authority Magazine, and Medium Thrive Global
Thank you so much for sharing these important insights. We wish you continued success and good health!
This article was originally featured on Authority Magazine.
What are your thoughts on Bonnie’s tactics for escaping the comfort zone?
Are you somebody that feels like you’ve been held back by a fear of leaving your own comfort zone?
Leave your thoughts, questions, and pieces of advice in the comment section below.